We had our egg retrieval today, and they got six eggs. Less than our last cycle. We had nine eggs last time, so I was a bit disappointed with only six.
The nurses said they were great quality, so we are hoping for a great fertilization report tomorrow.
The egg retrieval went very smoothly. They knocked me out, and I don't remember a thing. Joseph said I was talking gibberish in the recovery room, but nothing too embarrassing. :)
Everyone say a prayer or cross your fingers. We are hoping for some great embryos, but with only six eggs... We aren't working with a lot.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
Holding On
IVF isn't a sprint, it's a marathon. A marathon with a moving finish line. As you are running along in this marathon, you think you are three miles from the finish line. Then you pass a sign that says the finish line has been moved, and you are now five miles from the finish line. Only two more miles, right? You have already been so far, what are two more miles? Those extra two miles are huge, not only physically but mentally.
Our current cycle feels a lot like this. There have been a lot of issues with my medication doses, since I had so many problems my last IVF cycle. We started out WAY too low with the fear of repeating, and we basically wasted three days. My estrogen was incredibly low (not a good thing), it was somehow lower than before we started the medicines. They slowly moved my medicines up, and nothing really happened. It has been a trial and error cycle, and the word cancel has been used more than a few times.
When you are spending thousands of dollars on medications, the words, "Trial and error" and "Canceled".... not what you want to hear. Things seem to be turning around, but it changes daily. This cycle has been much more emotionally draining than the last.
Last time, I never thought about being canceled. My doctor was always happy with my levels, and he was confident we would get plenty of eggs. We had five embryos, and we sailed to the embryo transfer. Not a worry in the world. Then I overstimulated and was so, so sick. Physically, it was horrible.
It is never easy.
When you are spending thousands of dollars on medications, the words, "Trial and error" and "Canceled".... not what you want to hear. Things seem to be turning around, but it changes daily. This cycle has been much more emotionally draining than the last.
Last time, I never thought about being canceled. My doctor was always happy with my levels, and he was confident we would get plenty of eggs. We had five embryos, and we sailed to the embryo transfer. Not a worry in the world. Then I overstimulated and was so, so sick. Physically, it was horrible.
It is never easy.
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Fearless
Fearless is the only way to describe Blake in the water. He has zero concern. He thinks it is all fun, even when he gets splashed in the face. He is starting swimming lessons soon, since his lack of fear terrifies me. He will just walk right into the deep end, with no problems with the water being over his head. He is my water baby. We have already taught him to kick his legs and blow bubbles in the water. He is a water baby already, just like his mommy was.
Practicing kicking
So much fun at the pool!
He is SUCH a daddy's boy. They are best buddies, which his daddy loves.
Hurry Up and Wait
Delayed.
My body does not want to follow the "rules". Ever. While it is really frustrating, I have almost come to expect it. So when the ultrasound tech said that I have a cyst, I just shook my head. Of course I do. OHSS, pPROM, premature births, pregnancy induced hypertension, emergency c-section that required a urologist due to a ripped uterus... Normal? What is that?
The good news is that we later found out that it wasn't a cyst, just a huge follicle. My body apparently thinks the birth control pills that my doctor put me on were a challenge. They didn't work, and my body won. If we weren't infertile, we could be one of those couples that gets pregnant while on birth control pills.... but we are infertile.
I was given a shot to speed things up, but our cycle will still be delayed about two weeks. It was a blessing that it wasn't a cyst, as that would have delayed us a month or so. Of course we had Joseph's work schedule planned around these next two weeks. The end of July was really busy, so now he is trying to shift everything around. It looks like it is all going to work out, minus a few days that Blake is going to stay with his Nana and Pa.
So that is where we are. The good news is that I won't be completely uncomfortable for our anniversary. How has it been five years? Time has flown. I am so lucky to have such a great husband and father for Blake.
My body does not want to follow the "rules". Ever. While it is really frustrating, I have almost come to expect it. So when the ultrasound tech said that I have a cyst, I just shook my head. Of course I do. OHSS, pPROM, premature births, pregnancy induced hypertension, emergency c-section that required a urologist due to a ripped uterus... Normal? What is that?
The good news is that we later found out that it wasn't a cyst, just a huge follicle. My body apparently thinks the birth control pills that my doctor put me on were a challenge. They didn't work, and my body won. If we weren't infertile, we could be one of those couples that gets pregnant while on birth control pills.... but we are infertile.
I was given a shot to speed things up, but our cycle will still be delayed about two weeks. It was a blessing that it wasn't a cyst, as that would have delayed us a month or so. Of course we had Joseph's work schedule planned around these next two weeks. The end of July was really busy, so now he is trying to shift everything around. It looks like it is all going to work out, minus a few days that Blake is going to stay with his Nana and Pa.
So that is where we are. The good news is that I won't be completely uncomfortable for our anniversary. How has it been five years? Time has flown. I am so lucky to have such a great husband and father for Blake.
This is my favorite non-posed picture. We had just come in from taking pictures outside. It was roughly 100 degrees in North Carolina (hello humid and poor Joseph was wearing wool). My love gave me a sweet kiss and told me I looked pretty.
Monday, June 25, 2012
1081.72
1081.72
That is what we just paid for my medications. We were shocked that our insurance decided to cover more than we originally planed. It is still a sting to the bank account, which is currently crying over paying the IVF bill to our doctor almost a month ago. But, that is much less than the estimate we received of, "Up to 5,000 for medications". I did not know what to say to the woman who called from the specialty pharmacy. Relief.
So, our bill will be lower than we thought. We are hoping to have everything paid off quickly, since (hopefully) we will have added expenses of a new baby, or the cost of another cycle if this one fails. Infertility treatments are so unfair. You pay thousands of dollars to actually get pregnant, then your finances are so tight paying off the treatments, you can not afford all the baby things you have dreamed of.
IVF is a slow going process. Always waiting. Waiting to start medicines, waiting for the trigger shot, waiting for the egg retrieval, waiting for the fertilization report, waiting for the transfer, and waiting for the pregnancy test. I am not a great waiter, so I struggle with this.
We are finishing the first phase (birth control pills), and are ready to get into the actual IVF cycle. That should begin sometime next week. Expect some bruised belly, feeling horrible, completely uncomfortable, and hormonal posts in the near future ;)
So, let the fun begin!!!
That is what we just paid for my medications. We were shocked that our insurance decided to cover more than we originally planed. It is still a sting to the bank account, which is currently crying over paying the IVF bill to our doctor almost a month ago. But, that is much less than the estimate we received of, "Up to 5,000 for medications". I did not know what to say to the woman who called from the specialty pharmacy. Relief.
So, our bill will be lower than we thought. We are hoping to have everything paid off quickly, since (hopefully) we will have added expenses of a new baby, or the cost of another cycle if this one fails. Infertility treatments are so unfair. You pay thousands of dollars to actually get pregnant, then your finances are so tight paying off the treatments, you can not afford all the baby things you have dreamed of.
IVF is a slow going process. Always waiting. Waiting to start medicines, waiting for the trigger shot, waiting for the egg retrieval, waiting for the fertilization report, waiting for the transfer, and waiting for the pregnancy test. I am not a great waiter, so I struggle with this.
We are finishing the first phase (birth control pills), and are ready to get into the actual IVF cycle. That should begin sometime next week. Expect some bruised belly, feeling horrible, completely uncomfortable, and hormonal posts in the near future ;)
So, let the fun begin!!!
Monday, May 28, 2012
I lied...
After losing Ethan and Jacob, I swore that if we could get pregnant with just one baby.... I would never ask for another. Then Blake's difficult delivery further pushed that decision. I swore that Blake was going to be an only child. I was done with IVF, PPROM, shots, fear, stress, and c-sections. We were blessed with a beautiful, perfect little boy. I said I was done. No more. 21 months later, and here I am.... I lied.
I blame Joseph. It is his fault. He is the ultimate baby hog, and he made me lie. ;) That is my excuse anyway.
It looks like we are jumping back onto the infertility treatment roller coaster. We have gone through all of the testing, and made the big decision to move forward with another round of IVF. Our new doctor is pretty confident that we can avoid overstimulating again this time around. Hopefully, he is right. We are cautiously optimistic, but I have a bad history of surprising doctors. It would be lovely for this cycle to work with little drama associated with it. Praying for an easy, calm cycle that works.
So, we are looking at starting the IVF cycle toward the end of June. I didn't have a blog for our first IVF cycle, so I am excited to have this journey documented.
I blame Joseph. It is his fault. He is the ultimate baby hog, and he made me lie. ;) That is my excuse anyway.
It looks like we are jumping back onto the infertility treatment roller coaster. We have gone through all of the testing, and made the big decision to move forward with another round of IVF. Our new doctor is pretty confident that we can avoid overstimulating again this time around. Hopefully, he is right. We are cautiously optimistic, but I have a bad history of surprising doctors. It would be lovely for this cycle to work with little drama associated with it. Praying for an easy, calm cycle that works.
So, we are looking at starting the IVF cycle toward the end of June. I didn't have a blog for our first IVF cycle, so I am excited to have this journey documented.
Friday, April 13, 2012
Quiet
It's amazing how our brains adapt. How the yelling of a 19 month old can be normal. Depending on what he is yelling, it can also be beautiful. Blake now says "Wuv hoo" (love you). Silence is not normal in this house. It is amazing how I am conditioned to put my cell phone out of a toddlers little hand reach, even when he isn't here. I don't think twice about shutting doors to keep a 19 month out of the bathrooms, even when I don't need to.
Blake is spending a few days with his Nana and Pa. He did this a few times while Joseph was deployed, and he loves it. The boy gets so spoiled there. He is showered with love, undivided attention, new toys, and pizza. Nana also got sneaky this time and had a supply of suckers waiting. He loves it there. They love having him there. We miss him here. Blake is so blessed to have so many people who love him. My family is insanely obsessed with him, and it's wonderful. They get so excited to see him. They complain if they don't see him every few weeks. Blake calls them a few times a week to talk. He is a major part of their lives, and they are a big part of his life. He loves them just as much as they love him.
So, while the baby is away.... Joseph and I work. We have been upgrading our yard. When we bought our house, it came with these awful, ugly bushes. They were short and prickly... And ugly. So, they were removed and replaced with pretty flowers. We lined the flower garden with bricks and filled it with mulch.
We start on our vegetable garden tomorrow. I am really excited about having a garden this year. I haven't had one in two years. We moved/I was hugely pregnant in 2010 and last summer Joseph was deployed. A garden was very, very low on my priority list. So, Blake is off having the time of his life at Nana and Pa's house. We are at home moving bricks and raking mulch. How life has changed.
Blake is spending a few days with his Nana and Pa. He did this a few times while Joseph was deployed, and he loves it. The boy gets so spoiled there. He is showered with love, undivided attention, new toys, and pizza. Nana also got sneaky this time and had a supply of suckers waiting. He loves it there. They love having him there. We miss him here. Blake is so blessed to have so many people who love him. My family is insanely obsessed with him, and it's wonderful. They get so excited to see him. They complain if they don't see him every few weeks. Blake calls them a few times a week to talk. He is a major part of their lives, and they are a big part of his life. He loves them just as much as they love him.
So, while the baby is away.... Joseph and I work. We have been upgrading our yard. When we bought our house, it came with these awful, ugly bushes. They were short and prickly... And ugly. So, they were removed and replaced with pretty flowers. We lined the flower garden with bricks and filled it with mulch.
We start on our vegetable garden tomorrow. I am really excited about having a garden this year. I haven't had one in two years. We moved/I was hugely pregnant in 2010 and last summer Joseph was deployed. A garden was very, very low on my priority list. So, Blake is off having the time of his life at Nana and Pa's house. We are at home moving bricks and raking mulch. How life has changed.
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