Moving and Baby..

We are still preparing for our move in June. I feel like I should have an index for all my lists. Overall, it's going well. I still need to do the last minute things, and we need to get our house rented out.

Pregnancy is going well. I'm so much more active this time around. With Blake, I was scared to move. This time, I don't have that luxury. I'm chasing a two year old around the park for hours at a time. We will see how that works for me at the end, but I'm hoping my body can keep up with Blake.

I'm 21 weeks pregnant, which is great. I am counting down the weeks until 24 weeks. 24 weeks is viability week, and baby has a 50% chance of survival if born. It was our major goal with the twins. We missed it by a week with them. I counted down until viability week with Blake, and now I'm doing it with Reid. I want to make it MUCH farther, but 24 weeks is my main goal right now. Then 28 weeks, then 32 weeks.

And... Yesterday, I had a moment that made me want to leave the swamp that we live in. While Blake and I were walking through the neighborhood, we found a snapping turtle. It was huge and pissed. Thankfully, my new neighbor came over and flipped him onto his back with a shovel. We called animal control, and two hours later Mr Turtle was hauled off in a truck.
Blake can now say "snapping turtle" as that he is scared of it. Lovely swamp life.

Here is my attack turtle. He wanted to attack everyone. Snapping turtles are mean.

Home Sweet Home

The moment we found out that we were moving to New York, I started house hunting. It's hard here. We are spoiled by living near a large military base, and there has always been a huge rental market available. Not so much here. Our housing allowance is low for the area. Really low. I was looking at houses with green carpets, murals on the walls, and disgusting looking bathrooms. Anything that looked nice was in a horrible part of town. Enter stress...

Joseph had to come up for an orientation and turn over, since the guy he is replacing will be long gone before we get here. I came with him, and we have been house hunting. We came with the idea of checking out areas to narrow our search.

I think we found a place. It was recommended by people Joseph will be working with. It's not advertised. It is a military only community. The houses are huge by Long Island standards. HUGE. It is an older home that needs some love. The kitchen and bathrooms are original. The floors are all hardwoods, so that's nice. It has two sunrooms, which gives us even more room.

It really needs some color. The walls are a dull white and it just screams cold and uninviting. The location is amazing. We are within walking distance to so many things. Joseph is within walking/running distance from work. So it will work for the next three years. It would be beautiful with some work, but we won't be here long enough to put the money into it (other than paint). If we would be here for a long time, I would love to update it and make it really shine.

So now we look for preschools and a hospital for my c section. I leave you with a picture of our new house.

Surprise

I have been a horrible blogger. I need to get back on the bandwagon :)

So.... Surprise! We are pregnant. I'm almost 18 weeks with a little boy.
We had a cake to tell our families. We also announced his name. He will be Reid Everett.

I'm very excited to have a brother for Blake. They are going to be best friends, and I can't wait to see all the trouble the two of them can get into.

We will move when I'm around 30 weeks. Things will be interesting! That's around the exact same time that we moved here with Blake's pregnancy. I'm a pro at moving late in pregnancy. Two of our three moves will be done pregnant.

I have my anatomy scan on Monday, and we are hoping for a healthy, happy boy. Then we leave for a week of house hunting, preschool hunting, and hospital touring. Joseph is also going to be working, since the guy he is replacing will be gone before we get there.

That's our family update. :) I'm hoping to blog a little more, now that the bulk of the moving work has been completed until the movers show up.

I leave you with pictures from our gender cake!

New York

The orders have been cut. Our home for the next three years will be.... Long Island, New York. To say it was a surprise would be an understatement. Completely not on our radar. Not even close. In fact when Joseph told me, I didn't believe him. I asked him where the orders were really for.

It's been a pain to say the least. Everything is expensive in Long Island. Everything. Car insurance, gas, heat, rent, food... If you use it regularly, it's expensive. The military is nice enough to give us an allowance to offset those costs. We get an astounding 120.00 a month. That will cover half of our heating bill during the winter. I think it will be nice once we get there, but getting there is a pain right now.

I'm trying to embrace the "Bloom where planted" idea. I'm going with an open mind, and I'm hoping that it is a memorable three years. The great part about it is that Joseph will have normal hours. There will be no deployment, training, or crazy hours. This is as close to having a "normal" job as possible in the military. We are really excited about trying out this whole "normal" life for awhile.

I'm off to research NY cheesecake and pizza.... The important things.

Goodbye 2012

2012 was a mixed bag for our family.  We had some really great moments.  Wonderful, happy, breathtaking moments.  We also had some heartbreaking moments.  Utterly shocking and heartbreaking.  I have had a hard time deciding on how to classify 2012.  I am going to go with mixed bag.

In February, we welcomed Joseph home from a long, long deployment.  It was amazing to see him hold his little man again.  Watching Blake and Joseph get to know each other again was exciting.  Things had changed so much from a seven month old to a fifteen month old.  Diaper changes were entirely different.  Baths were both terrifying (for mommy) and a party at the same time.  Joseph had a lot to learn about the differences between a not-yet-crawling seven month old and a wild fifteen month old.  2012 has truly turned Blake from a Mommy's boy to a Daddy's boy.  He adores Joseph, and I am so glad to see that almost a year away did not cause any bonding issues. 

We have been on countless trips this year.  We have had so much family time.  It has been a drastic change from when Joseph was working at a busy, deploying unit.  That part of the year was great, and it was much needed.

Blake has grown from a baby one year old into a two year old little boy. He is talking in full sentences now. Watching that transformation is shocking.  How is it that my baby was struggling to walk this time last year, and he is now jumping, running, and climbing? How is that possible?

Of course, the year ended with struggles.  Miscarriage, D&C, laparoscopic surgery, another round of IVF...  The miscarriage was hard.  I never realized how hard miscarriages are.  Having a loss as late as Ethan and Jacob, people immediately understand how heartbreaking it is.  Miscarriage is such a different experience.  Such different emotions and expectations. 

Our IVF cycle was abnormally successful, which we are grateful for. Having ten embryos in the freezer means that we won't have to face IVF again.  That is a blessing that I never thought I would have.  We were happy with ONE frozen embryo from our last cycle.  Having ten is something I never dreamed we would have. 

2013 should be an interesting one.  We hope to have another baby in 2013.  Blake will be starting preschool.  Joseph is due for orders.  We are possibly facing an overseas move (Japan), selling or renting our house, a new unit, and a new unit's schedule.  My main resolution for this year is to relax.  No worrying about things out of my control... or at least not as much.

Happy New Year everyone.  I hope 2013 brings everything you wish for. 

And Now We Wait...

We arrived Saturday morning for our transfer. We had not heard from the office about our embryos since our day two report on Wednesday. They had said that no news is good news, so we were hoping for quiet.

They brought us back to the room, and I immediately noticed that there were no embryos in the incubator. ::enter panic:: The embryologist informed us that there were a few egg retrievals that morning. Since they are time sensitive, we were being pushed back a little.

Then he gave us our report. I was hoping for three to four to freeze. Both of my other cycles, we have had one to freeze. This time we had.... NINE to freeze! We were shocked. I did not know how to respond. Of the fifteen we had on day two, nine had made it to a good quality, freeze worthy embryo. That does not include what we transferred. Nine is amazing and completely surprising.

My doctor was very happy with how everything turned out. He came in with a giant grin on his face. This cycle required a lot of thinking on his part. My levels were difficult to control, and I was on the edge of overstimulating for the majority of it.

Our transfer went exceptionally well. We followed my doctor's recommendation for transferring two. He wanted to repeat our last cycle, so we did the exact same thing with similar grading of the embryos.

So now we wait. I'm on bed rest for the next few days, then back to normal and waiting.


Here are our nine waiting in the freezer.

Finding a Bubble

Yesterday morning, twenty little babies left for school that will never come home. Devastating. I wonder about that morning. Did one of them not want to wake up, and mommy made them? Was one child excited about a class event? Were they running late and rushing? Was the Elf on the Shelf a fixture in their homes like it is ours? Did they talk about Santa's upcoming visit? The small details that those parents will forever hold from their last morning. I pray that each one of those parents hugged and kissed their child before sending them to school yesterday.

I can't imagine how devastating it would be to arrive at a firehouse frantically looking for your child, and they aren't there. The drive back home.... Walking into your home.... Waiting for confirmation.

My first instinct is to never let Blake go. I want to shield him from this cruel world. I want to protect his innocence. I want to keep him in a bubble. Blake has no idea that bad people exist, and it is one of my favorite things about his sweet personality. He will flash that Blake smile and say "Hey" to almost everyone. He has no idea of evil. No concept. I want to protect that for as long as possible.

But, it isn't possible. Sure, I can home school him. I can keep him locked in our house forever. But what kind of life is that? A shooting can happen anywhere. Of course when it is in a school it is shocking and horrifying. It could easily happen at a park, the grocery store, or Blake's favorite frozen yogurt store (which he calls "Ike ceam"). We live close to a military base, and we could be injured in a military aircraft accident.... Or a terrorist attack. Or a car accident. The list is endless.

Living in fear is not living. Blake will attend school, and it will probably be public for the majority of his years. I pray that I am never in any of these parent's shoes, but I can not shelter my child. He deserves to experience all the perks of school and hopefully college. We can't live in fear of bad things or bad people.

That do not mean I won't worry, because I will. It doesn't mean I won't kiss him pray he is safe everyday, because I will. It just means that we don't have control.